You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
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