My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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