we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
He passed out mid-signature
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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