just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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