next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize