Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
