once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
