i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
True college students do jello shots in the library
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
