My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
