FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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