sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize