It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize