I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
