I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize