Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
