I like my sex mixed with concussions.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
