We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Randomize
