this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
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