You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
