How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
