I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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