Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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