I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
