i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
