i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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