I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Randomize
