I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
