My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
now i know why i became what i already was.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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