Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
