Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
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