Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
