thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
