ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
