i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
