In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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