You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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