Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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