Acid is not a monday night drug
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
