Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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