He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
P.S. I can't hear my feet
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
