I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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