wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
