So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
