Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Randomize
