Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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