My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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