Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
