# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
