I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
