What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
