I want to have your abortion
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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