Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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